


Act Natural So That I'm Not A Human Disaster

by Veera_Kara



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, BUT NOT IN FRONT OF THE DAD, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Flirting, Getting Together, M/M, Morning After, One Night Stands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-29
Updated: 2016-04-29
Packaged: 2018-06-05 04:22:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6688981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Veera_Kara/pseuds/Veera_Kara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>10/10 says that when you moved out it was so your dad wouldn’t walk in on the awkward morning after with your one-night stand. But Stiles’ dad manages to do that <em>anyways</em>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Act Natural So That I'm Not A Human Disaster

 

Three loud knocks on his front door made Stiles groan and pull the covers above his head to try and pretend no one was knocking. Keeping his eyes shut, he used his feet to tighten his hold on the blanket to become a human burrito, but the knocking persisted. The pounding at his head and his dry throat made his mood even worse.

“Who the fuck is at the door”, he grumbled out, and regretfully opened the covers to the chill air and sleepily walked through his apartment. Later he’d blame it on his hangover and the fact that he couldn’t wake up without coffee, but it wasn’t until he got to the front door on shaky legs and a limp in his step that he realized something was off.

He wasn’t even wearing clothes.

 “Uh…” _I’m pretty sure I would have remembered going to bed naked?_

“One second!” He shouted out to the person waiting at the door, quickly grabbing a pair of sweatpants from the floor of his bedroom. He quickly glanced at the other clothes scattered along the floor and slowly realized that … some of those clothes weren’t his? Did he even own a leather jacket?

“Huh”, he wondered, but shook it off. He wasn’t going to have any real thought processes until he had a cup of coffee.

Except… walking and being awake for a minute made him notice something else. The ache and soreness after… after sex. The uncomfortable itch between his legs and another look around his room (the scattered clothes, the mess of his bed) made Stiles realize that someone else was here last night.

The knocking continued.

Stiles jumped quickly, internally berating himself for not noticing his surroundings or sense of self, put on the sweatpants as fast as he could. He didn’t have time to shower or brush his teeth but noticed that the shower _was_ running…  

_What the fuck. Who did I sleep with last night?_

Hearing another knock on his door made Stiles quickly walk towards his door. Unlocking it, Stiles looked through the cracks and suddenly wished he knew more of what happened last night.

“Dad? What are you doing here?”

John Stilinski raised an eyebrow and placed his hands in the pockets of his jacket. “Son. Good to see you’re well.” He eyed the door and it took Stiles a few seconds to realize that his dad wanted to come in.

“Uh yeah… Come in…” Opening the door fully, Stiles looked back to the bathroom where the shower was still running. _Well this isn’t awkward._

“Do you have a guest over?” John asked with a sly tone, and Stiles smiled with his lips pursed.

“Yep. Anyways. Want coffee?” Because he needed coffee and maybe alcohol to get through this. As if this encounter with a stranger wasn’t going to be awkward enough on its own.

Though, granted, alcohol probably got him into this mess in the first place. How much did he even drink last night? Everything felt like a blur.

John smiled, and Stiles looked at him warily while walking to the kitchen. Oh shit. “That the boyfriend you’ve been telling me about?”

Almost tripping over his own step, Stiles grabbed a towel from the kitchen and pretended to clean the mess on his counter to make it look like he tripped on purpose. John raised an eyebrow but shook his head and went to sit down at his kitchen table.

Stiles bit his cheek, remembering the quick lie he had told his dad a month ago about some imaginary boyfriend who was the reason he couldn’t visit home. When in reality, Stiles was working extra shifts at the café and at the library to try and pay off some of the student loans he knew his dad wasn’t telling him about.

Of course, admitting he didn’t have a boyfriend would inevitably lead to _why_ he was lying and that meant telling his dad that he was snooping through his mail again. 

Stiles weighed the two options in his mind and came to a conclusion.

“Yeah… He doesn’t know that you’re here… Why are you here again?”

John leaned back against his chair. “Just wanted to make sure you were okay… Also stopped by to check your locks. There’s been a series of burglaries in your apartment complex.”

Stiles was about to answer but another voice interrupted him. 

“Wait, really?”  

Both Stiles and his dad looked towards the back of the apartment, where a (delicious and handsome, Stiles thought inwardly) was standing, a wet towel around his neck and (thankfully) wearing– were those _his_ clothes??? 

John smiled and stood up, and then walked towards the man to greet him. “Not how I wanted us to meet but it’s great meeting Stiles’ boyfriend. Name’s John”, he said, extending his hand out to shake the man’s.

The shirt-stealing gorgeous man nodded with an easy smile on his face, “Derek. I actually live upstairs. It’s great to finally meet you!”

_What the hell is he doing?_ Stiles wondered, and tried to look inconspicuous while making the coffee.

“Stiles, don’t you think you should put on a shirt?” John asked, and Stiles glared at him over his shoulder but nonetheless walked towards his bedroom. 

“I wouldn’t have to if _someone_ called before stopping by”, he grumbled. Stiles grabbed Derek’s arm and pulled him into the bedroom, “I need to talk to Derek!” 

Stiles quickly pushed Derek into his bedroom, closed the door and locked it to make sure his dad didn’t walk in by accident. 

“Uh… Hey”, Stiles said, turning around to face ~~the music~~ Derek. 

Derek smiled and Stiles felt his breath hitch. “Hi.” 

“I’m… Stiles, but you probably guessed that. Considering you met my dad.” Stiles kept his hand on the doorknob behind him, needing something to do besides stare at Derek’s shoulders. Dammit, he had a thing for broad shoulders and arms. Too bad he could barely remember last night. 

Derek chuckled and glanced at Stiles, and his eyes dropped down to Stiles’ shirtless chest. “Derek. Your dad seemed nice”, he said, leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets. Stiles gulped, and started walking to his dresser to get a shirt and blushed when he saw Derek following his every move.

Stiles sarcastically laughed, “Yeah, he’s great except his tendency to be nosy means he thinks we’re dating now.” Stiles found a red T-shirt and pulled it over his head. “Sorry about that by the way. I lied to him a month ago about having a boyfriend.” 

Stiles turned around and jumped when he saw Derek right behind him. “That’s alright. I get it. Family right?” 

“I-I’ll just go tell him the truth now; I’m sure that’s not something you want on your plate—”. Stiles stopped talking when he felt Derek’s hand on his arm, and not even a moment later Derek pulled Stiles closer to him, pressing his cheek against his to talk into his ear

“I don’t mind being your boyfriend…” Stiles squirmed when he felt Derek’s other hand wrap around his hip, his skin heating up at his touch. “Do you?” 

Stiles blinked and tried to process. “U-uh no, I… wait what?” 

The corner of Derek’s lip turned upwards in a smirk and Stiles was… _flabbergasted._ That’s what he was. Scratch that, there were no words for how he felt around Derek.

“T-that’s um”, Stiles coughed, trying to get the words out of his throat. “That’s my shirt.”

Derek slowly looked down at the shirt he was wearing and calmly looked back at Stiles’ face. “Hmm you’re right. My bad.” And with that as his only warning, Derek leaned back and took off the shirt, dropping it to the ground and smiling at the way Stiles’ jaw dropped.

“U-uh…” Stiles blinked. His jaw moved up and down a few times as if trying to _talk_ , but Stiles wasn’t entirely sure how he was supposed to do that when staring perfection in the face.

Derek leaned back into his space, the heat from his body enveloping Stiles’ and he had to lean back into the dresser to compensate. The wood dug into his lower back but Stiles couldn’t find that he minded, considering Derek was nipping at his neck. He breathed in Stiles’, digging his nose along the curve of his neck while he kissed his jawline. “So, what do you say?”

Stiles was nodding before he even realized he was nodding. “Yeah. Yes, yes, _yes_ — “, he moaned out breathily, welcoming Derek’s lips in a searing kiss and made his toes curl. Stiles leaned into Derek and brought his hand up to cup Derek’s jaw as he closed the space between them and pressed a thigh between Derek’s legs. He wondered how he could get this lucky, and while he couldn’t remember what happened _last night_ , he had _no_ problem recreating new memories this morning—

And as if on cue, Stiles’ dad knocked on the door. “Stiles, did you forget I’m here? I still have _ears_.”  


End file.
